Friendship and the Mental Health Connection
Today, on the first Friday of April, we are going to explore how friendships bolster our mental health.
Hey Friend.
So glad you are here. Friday Five is all about being intentional about our mental health. 5 ideas, questions, tools, and resources to encourage you to lean in, care for yourself, and reset.
This is one of my favourite topics! Why? Because I am blessed with awesome friends and can say with confidence that they save my mental health. Seriously!
“Friendship is a crucial element in protecting our mental health. Our friends can keep us grounded, help us get things in perspective, and help us manage the problems that life throws at us” (Mental Health Foundation, 2021).
What are some of the benefits of friendships? According to the Mayo Clinic (2022), friends:
increase our sense of belonging and purpose
boost our happiness and reduce our stress
improve our self-confidence and our self-worth
help us cope with traumas (divorce, serious illness, job loss, or death of a loved one)
encourage us to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits (such as excessive drinking, lack of exercise)
It is found that friendships play a large role in our overall health. Evidently, “adults with strong social connections have a reduced risk of many significant health problems, including depression, high blood pressure and an unhealthy body mass index. Studies have found that older adults who have meaningful relationships and social support are likely to live longer than their peers with fewer connections” (Mayo Clinic, 2022).
So, if there are many incredible benefits to friendship, why do I hear so often in my therapy practice that people don’t have good friends? It’s not that these clients aren’t wonderful people. They are! Here are some reasons why having friends can be difficult for people:
1) It can be hard to make new friends as an adult or to maintain existing friendships due to a shift in priorities (Mayo Clinic, 2022).
2) Reaching out to initiate a new (friendship) relationship requires vulnerability and will likely feel awkward. Flashback to middle school! It takes courage to put yourself out there, but I believe it’s worth the risk!
3) We have all been living through a pandemic for the last two years, which means there has been COVID isolation. The good news is that we have all been living this reality, and I am guessing that we are all pretty much ready to get out of the house and start connecting with other humans again.
Here are 5 great ways to nurture friendships:
1. Be kind. It might be obvious but it isn’t always practiced. Show someone you care.
2. Be a good listener. Ask curious questions and then listen without distraction (put away the phone).
3. Open up. A willingness to be vulnerable and share deepens the connection.
4. Show that you can be trusted. Don’t gossip, and honour the person’s personal stories.
5. Make yourself available. Even if you have a full schedule, find little ways to connect. There’s usually time for social media, and cultivating a friendship is WAY more fulfilling!
Take away — choose one person you will reach out to this week. Try to plan to connect with them preferably in person or online. This can be an old friend, a current friend, or someone with whom you’d like to become friends. Move past the awkwardness and discomfort. It will be worth it!
References:
Mayo Clinic. (2022). Friendships: Enrich your Life and Improve your Health. Adult Health. Retrieved from: https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860
Mental Health Foundation. (2021). Friendship and Mental Health. Good Mental Health for All. Retrieved from: https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/f/friendship-and-mental-health